FakeBob Rants On Klinsy, Omar, Orozco

FakeBobBradley with an epic rant last evening. Reproduced with his consent below.
You’ll need to read from the bottom up.

FakeBob went on the attack...

I’d challenge @FakeKlinsmann to a Twitter duel, but I think he would just give excuses that he’s building for the future instead of scoring.

These guys thought Moses was something. THEY AIN’T SEEN NOTHING YET!

Oh, last thing. The weather here. Really gives a new meaning to “sweats.” OUT!

After the Beibs of course. He’s the diggity RT @The_Real_DA Yes! @FakeBobBradley is tweeting again. The best twitter feed there is.

So does the USMNT my friend. So does the USMNT RT @DanaWessel @FakeBobBradley Miss ya, coach.

This has been fun. Maybe we can do this tomorrow. I’ll bring the strategy, experience & hummus and Klinsmann can bring his notepad.

Except for my attire RT @FJGadsby If there’s anything that can be said for @FakeBobBradley, it’s that he prevents you from falling asleep.

I just got an email from Twitter. They think my account have been compromised. Um, that happened a long time ago thank you very much Sunil!!

There are a lot of distractions here. Like gunfire and bombings and annoying little people that speak about a thing called democracy.

I’ve always wanted to not use an MLS players. AND NOT I HAVE MY CHANCE. MU-HAH-HAH-HAH!

I just got retweeted by @fire_bobbradley — the guy with that handle is either confused or can be found wearing a LeBron Cavaliers jersey.

I have to go soon. The 17 quarters that gave me 3 mins & 45 seconds at the laundromat down the street on the 56K connection are almost up.

Not to be outdone by the oh-so-original Kaiser, I’ve decided that our kits will employ hieroglyphics when we face Brazil. Take that Blondie!

I think it’s great that the US is having open practices now. Might as well be open-bar too.

Dear @FakeKlinsmann, I have rounded out my staff WITH ASSISTANT COACHES THAT ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING!

Fire Jurgen Klinsmann! (“Just got that t-shirt from Junior in the mail”) ….oh f*ck, I thought I was dm’ing Omar again.

In a nod to my successor in America, I’ve decided to recruit players from the Sudan. I’ve heard the Sudano influence cures all!

Who do you think will have more goals in 2012? The USMNT or Robbie Findley. Think before you answer, you’ll thank me.

I love that @FakeKlinsmann gave Landon, Dempsey’s #10 kit. How cute. Might as well give Orozco Fiscal, Bornstein’s #12 kit.

Really excited about our new centerback prospect! Mohamed Omarus Abdul Gonzalez.

Do I have this straight? Fans are excited about a 1-0 victory over a JV team in the rain? I thought the expectations were supposed to go up?

4 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Alex on 2011/10/11 at 6:32 AM

    This is dumb.

    Reply

  2. Glad to see FakeBob is still doing his thing. When I get bored at work reading his old posts make my day.

    Reply

  3. Posted by Alex on 2011/10/11 at 12:07 PM

    I’ve missed FakeBobBradley.

    Reply

  4. if only vegas would make odds on who would win the twitter battle between the fake bradley and the fake klinsi.

    Reply

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